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4/10: Mystery Girl, I recall, way back, that as soon as we booted you from the band, you were quick to find other work. How fitting, too, that you would support a "calcium cause" - we always suspected that the reason you couldn't do an aerial was because your bones were weak, despite your insistance that you were the strongest of us all. Was this your way of publicly stating, "I told you so"? What you may not know is that we felt real bad after letting you go. Karen wasn't cutting it. We've been asked to do a Holiday Special (you know, kind of like A Very Brady Christmas) this year. Would you consider a cameo appearance?
4/6 Update: Another mailing (and photo!) came in from "Mystery Girl". Here's the text:
"This is all very cute except for one thing - you and Nancy are living double lives that are riddled with lies and deception. You'll notice in the last picture I sent, I'm about to choke you and I think you know why. Now it's time for everyone else to know...
After the decline of folk rock in the 70's, you, Nancy and I dismantled our band (What was our name? Did we ever have one?) and went on to eventually form The Spice Girls. As Sporty Spice, I thought I was doing a really good job with my cartwheels and roundoffs on stage. You and Nancy thought otherwise... That's right, I couldn't do a side aerial so you fired me and replaced me with Karen Shimp!!!! So you three went on to fame and fortune, even starring in Charlie's Angels. I'm glad you're happy.
Things turned out well for me too. I inherited my parents' home in Armonk where I live in the garage while renting out the house to dot com millionaires. Oh yeah, and I run the snack bar at Windmill Club. I get all the frozen Snicker bars I want...for free.
I hope you were honest with your fellow classmates at the reunion and told the truth. I still think you and Nancy owe me an apology. You know where to find me - the snack bar.
xxoo mystery girl"
A personal note to Mystery Girl: Thanks for helping me decide if I should ever go blonde... obviously, I won't! I've been considering that "burgundy tint"... what can you do for me? 4/5: Our mystery artist strikes again (Spice Girl photo below)! This time, a clue is left... here is the text:
"This new jpg is a clue to my identity...I don't think I look that different than I did back in the 70s. So sorry I had to miss the party. I heard it was wonderful!
xxoo mystery girl"  TRUE STORY: I think it was December 2000... This photo was sent to me by an email address that was unknown to me. Originally, I didn't even open it (the virus fear!). Then it was sent again and again, so I finally opened it and found the following photo... Despite numerous efforts to find out who sent it, including the interrogation of the most likely suspects at the Reunion, no one has come forward to claim their obvious mastery of PhotoShop (I should point out that the PhotoShop work was only required on the Nancy and Karen part of the photo... how they ever acquired that real photo of me also remains a mystery!).
Anyway, we are offering a REWARD for any information that leads to the identification of the person who sent this photo. Please post your leads to the Message Board. |
